I have been doing awesome with my working out and eating healthy. I lost 48 pounds prior to vacation a few weeks ago and I felt great. Granted, I didn't reach my 50 pounds lost before vacay goal, but I came close enough to still feel amazing. On vacation I didn't workout or eat healthy. It's vacation! Get over it! I came back, got on the scale and gained 4 pounds. No biggie! I was okay with the weight gain because I had fun and I didn't feel like a stick in the mud that watched every calorie while I'm supposed to be relaxing and having fun.
Then I get back from vacation and tell myself, "Okay Davina. Vacation is over and it's back to working out and eating healthy again." Easy enough I thought. So, I go back to eating semi-healthy. Not as good as I was being, but I was better than I was on vacation. Then I realized that my eating habits were slacking a bit, so I forced myself and get back on track with my healthy eating and watching my carb intake again. The problem is that the whole working out thing hasn't happened since I've been back from vacation and I'm hating it.
When I workout I feel amazing and I feel like I'm getting healthier with each workout I do. I only do workouts that I enjoy (most recently running and yoga) and I keep myself going by knowing that it will get me to continue losing the weight that I so badly need to and want to lose. The problem is that everyday that I've woken up and told myself that today will be my first day back to working out, I find something else to do to avoid doing it. I don't get it. I know how great I feel afterwards, I do workouts I enjoy, yet since I got back from vacation, I've dreaded the thought of working out. It's like my brain and body are fighting over whether or not I should workout and even though my brain knows I need to, my body gets into lazy mode and refuses to.
I'm stuck in this rut and I don't know how to get out of it. I suppose forcing myself to just do it for day after day will eventually get me back on track, but taking that first step back into it is absolutely killing me. I almost feel like I need a workout buddy, but that's not realistic right now. My closest friends all have gym memberships and that's how they workout for the most part and I personally refuse to get another gym membership. I don't like paying to use machines that I don't need. I have weights at home, tons of workout DVDs, I have a treadmill at home, and I'm capable of running outside while the weather is still beautiful. I don't need to have another monthly bill to pay when I can do all my working out at home. Then there is my boyfriend. He wants to get in shape too, but everytime I bring up working out, he agrees to do it with me and then keeps putting it off when I ask him about starting. I love him dearly, but he's more of a procrastinator when it comes to working out than I could ever be. So, I'm pretty much on my own, meaning I'm just going to have to force myself to do it whether or not I like it. Then, as my body gets back in the groove of things, maybe it'll stop being so lazy about doing my normal workout routine.
Ugh...why does losing weight have to be so stressful? I wish I could take it off as quickly as I put it on.
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