Ok, I lied. I just posted that I was off to be a gamer geek, but it seems there is an update at needs to download before I can play, so I'm going to use this time to get some advice from you lovely people.
This weekend I have the bachelorette party that I'm supposed to go to for my friend that's getting married next weekend (the friend whose wedding I'm standing up in). Well, her bachlorette party consists of renting a suburban (limo prices were ridiculous), going to a drag queen show which includes dinner, and then finally followed by a night club (if you guys don't know how I feel about night clubs, read a few posts back and I get into great detail about my opinions of them). We're not even going to start to go out until about 8:00pm. This is late for me since I'm usually sleeping by 11:00pm. Not to mention the night club reviews are just terrible reviews almost all the way around. I'm surprised their still open considering it seems like it's more disliked that not.
Anyways, the reviews of the night club isn't the direction I was meaning to go with this. I'm trying to figure out if I should even go to this bachelorette party. Let me give you all my reasons for wondering about this. For starters...
~ It starts late for me since I get really tired by like 10:30 or 11:00pm. I can force myself to stay awake, but then I'm out of it and my eyes feel itchy and I'm just uncomfortable and even cranky sometimes. By the time my normal bed time rolls around, I doubt we'll even be completely done with the drag queen show and dinner let alone the full night meaning I have a lot of forcing myself to stay awake ahead of me. The other down side to me forcing myself to stay awake longer than my body would like me to is that I get bad headaches from this. So, I may end up being miserable with discomfort forcing myself to do this.
|~ Then it's the whole situation that I HATE night clubs. I would rather spend a night in jail than to go to a night club. No joke! So, the idea of forcing myself to stay awake for something I hate seems ridiculous.
~ Then there's the whole clothing situation. I can't afford to buy a new outfit specifically for this night. I have nothing that would be acceptable for a club of any kind. I don't own any pants other than jeans (which aren't even allowed at most night clubs) and business pants. All my shirts are either business, t-shirts, tank tops, or just plain style casual clothes (most of which are not allowed to wear at clubs). I'm not a big fashion buff, so my clothing is very plain jane.
~ Then, last but not least, I'm super tight on money and the idea of having to chip in for the car we're all renting, then to pay for the drag queen show, dinner, drinks, and whatever will need to be spent at the night club just seems like something completely out of my money availability zone. I don't want to be the downer because I'm too broke to enjoy myself and I definitely don't want to have an I.O.U. to anyone. Sorry, but I hate owing people money.
So, it's like I really shouldn't go to this bachelorette party, but I feel like I'd be a bad friend to not go since I know I'm not only one of her oldest friends, but I'm one of her bridesmaids. I feel like if I wasn't standing up in the wedding it would be acceptable for me to skip this, but with me standing up in the wedding, I feel like I have to go. It's just I can't afford it and realistically I don't think I would be good company between me getting tired and just overall having a hard time hiding when I'm not interested in something.
Please help me with some advice! I need some input on what to do. I'm completely unsure at the moment and could use any words of advice that can be offered.
The options I see are
ReplyDelete1. You go and end up being miserable for all the reasons you mentioned, but feel slightly better in knowing that you were there for your friend to celebrate her last bits of "freedom" before her special day.
2. You don't go, you save money on clothes, cover charges, alcohol, and your share of the limo rental, but you feel bad not being there for a lifelong friend.
3. You make an appearance at one or part of one of the festivities planned, although this would still likely go against the clothes + money situation. It could be a way to meet in the middle, but it could also be more hassle than help.
In reality, she will most likely appreciate everything you've done and will be doing in order to participate in her big day, which some would view as more important than the bachelorette party. She might be disappointed at not seeing you there because you have been friends for so long and you are standing up in the wedding. However, given how long you have both known each other, she has to know/understand that you both don't share the same exact tastes, and you're in a spot where you just can't afford to spend beyond your means right now. While this might be part of one of the biggest events of her life, it's certainly not the last one you will celebrate together.
Talk to her, explain where you stand, and good luck!